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Peeking Out of My Cave, P1

April 20, 2013 By 59 Comments

soapboxpileThis has been a bad week for humanity; let’s face it this has been a bad week no matter where on the political spectrum we fall. For some of us, for those of us who were hoping to see sanity in Washington it has been worse even than we expected. I will admit it, I have had a difficult time taking this week in, not just the national scene but some of the local sheer ugliness has caused me to rock back on my heels and question, what the hell really just what in the hell.

I spent part of the later of the week on Facebook, this time though I didn’t spend it doing one of my past favorite things; arguing with Azzhats. No this week I spent it simply deleting them, unless they were family members. I find I no longer have the energy or inclination to try to pull the curtain back on ignorance with pithy comments to Right Wing Meme’s on Guns, Immigration, Abortion or any combination of same, nope this week fly across my line of sight with some ignorant lack of compassion and I simply deleted you forever, bye-bye .

For the most part though, I have stayed silent allowing the horror of the week to sink in, allowing my heart and my mind to wrap itself around all of it and absorb it. So often we react, lash out in anger and pain, we fail to consider the consequences, on friends or ourselves. So, I sat and listened to others including the idiots in the media, everyone seemed to have an opinion or a source, most of them were bad or ugly or both. I did a great deal of reading, my apologies if I didn’t get to you this week, my energy seemed to be flagging, between all the horror in the broader world and what I simply couldn’t avoid closer to home, I thought it would be better for me and maybe for you if I just crawled into my cave with the lights out.

There are times when the world crashes in on us and it is impossible to escape, impossible not to react without fury, heartbreak, or both. This week the horror stories crashed like waves pounding a beach, one after another without it seemed a break. For every wave that crashed it seemed there was some pundit or politician with something to say, rarely anything positive, uplifting or in many cases true mind you just something to say. If it wasn’t the politicians capitalizing on tragedy or the media bloviating continuously and without purpose, it was the ignoramus Azzhats from both sides of the spectrum making pointless accusations, blowing up already terrible tragedies, pointing fingers or celebrating insanity.

I peeked out of my cave, I gnashed my teeth and frankly, I wept for us all before pulling my head back in and turning the lights off.

The week started for me watching the Dallas Police chase a murderous fool with a gun. Through city streets, he drove his car leading a chase, occasionally shooting at police. Why was this so interesting? This worthless piece of humanity had just shot his soon to give birth girlfriend, the result of his action – he was captured after crashing his car and running into an abandoned house. Unfortunately, both his girlfriend and her unborn child lost their lives, her because of the gunshot and the baby due to oxygen starvation before the doctors could intervene. I met a friend of this young woman’s the following day at a Starbucks I stop at coffee for each day, I listened to the horror of that day for her and the family who had waited at the hospital. The horror as they prayed for a different outcome. All I could do, as I cried with her is hand her my card, offer comfort and silently damn a nation that will not do more to protect us.

justice

Their story was overshadowed by the Boston Marathon, the lost lives, the horror of the runners who lost limbs. The fear and terror of random violence in what should have been a moment of great triumph for so many. I watched with great pride in my fellow men and women as they ran toward the terror to help others, there are still heroes in this world. I watched Boston respond I was lifted up.

Then came the shit storm, from all sides then came the speculation and the jumping to conclusions and stirring the pot to get a rise out of already highly charged emotions. Maybe I am just overly sensitive, maybe I have a high Bullshit meter, but really why do politicians, pundits and talking heads have to flap their lips when they truly have no information other than their own fears, prejudice and ignorance to guide them, I only want to know. Why is the best we can hope for from our fellow human beings is picture after picture of another human beings terrible injuries, horrific suffering? Why is this the first thing, sometimes the only thing shown along with the accusations of the perpetrators being “Dark Skinned Males“, long before anything was known.

Terrorist Attack – yes, because it created terror in the population

Is anyone aware of who else committed Terrorist Attacks on US Soil?

Timothy McVeigh – Oklahoma City Bomber, 168 people dead, 800 injured. Race: White, Religion: Roman Catholic

Terry Nicols –Oklahoma City Bomber, 168 people dead, 800 injured. Race: White, Religion: Christian

Ted Kaczynski – Unabomber, 3 dead, 11 injured in multiple attacks. Race: White, Religion: Agnostic

Want to know what all of the above have in common, other than being murderers on the Terrorist side of the house, Enemies of the State and if you believe in Hell either already there (Timothy McVeigh) or on their way. Well, let me tell you they were all Mirandized at their arrest, they were all given due process of the law based on our Constitution, they were all presumed “Innocent Until Proven Guilty”.

Dzhokhar Tsarnaev – Boston Marathon Bomber Suspect, 4 dead (includes officer at MIT), 140+ injured. Race: White, Religion: Islam, Citizenship: USA

What is the difference? Oh, yeah there it is, he is not a Christian! Certainly, his crime isn’t up there with Terrorist Duo Timothy and Terry. Do not misunderstand me, what Dzhokhar and his brother are suspected of is terrible, what they are accused of perpetuating against innocent people is an act of terror. I do not excuse this, not by any means. Nevertheless, since when do we suspend our Constitution, our fundamental rights simply as a convenience? Again and in stronger language, WTF! He is a nineteen-year-old kid, we don’t need to suspend his rights he is alone in the world, injured and scared. No matter the crime, no matter the heinous act this is still last, I checked the United States of America and we still are a nation of Laws, we are still all afforded the “innocent until proven guilty” rule, aren’t we?

I weep for all of us. I weep for our disintegration. I weep for our willingness to turn our backs when the suspect is not like us. I weep that we are willing to cheer this suspension of law.

I ask you all, what is next?Kickm

Stay tuned, I will take on the rest of the week in the news later.

Filed Under: Series: The Soapbox, Society Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

DOMA Dammit

March 28, 2013 By 40 Comments

soapboxpileDOMA, The Defense of Marriage Act, signed by President William Jefferson Clinton on 21-September-1996 to protect ‘marriage’ and the government. No, Bill Clinton does not get a pass on this despite his current stand in support of Gay Marriage, despite his ‘Don’t do as I did, do as I say now.’ DOMA was then and is now an over-reach by the Federal Government based on Christian standards of marriage being between a one man and one woman, this despite there being nothing anywhere in the Bible to support this view, in fact if we want to be specific the Mormons had it right didn’t they? There are plenty of examples sprinkled throughout that tome our friends in Washington and all their little legislator whisperer’s like to point to when in doubt of marriage being between One Man and plenty of women.

Now that is today, in 2013 the social tide has shifted tremendously and the majority of the public isn’t so certain it is fair or even right to withhold Civil Rights from their fellow citizens simply because they are different. Different as in, they want to marry the same gender versus the opposite gender, nothing more or less that is really the only difference. They are now and always have been part of our society, they do now and always have paid taxes, fought in our wars, lived next door to us, had families, formed long-lasting and monogamous relationships. What they haven’t had, what we have prevented them from accessing is all the rights and privileges we take for granted, things like;

  • Rights of survivorship
  • Inheritance
  • Immigration
  • Next of kin, medical decision making and the right to visit a loved one in the hospital
  • Parenting children born in the relationship after the death of the natural parent
  • Tax benefits
  • Healthcare benefits
  • Social Security survivorship benefits
    • And a host of both private and public benefits marriage allows

All this because there are some people within our society, predominantly within the Christian

scene outside the Supreme Court day 1

scene outside the Supreme Court day 1

Evangelical Right who gained a heavy foothold in our government

and demanded their rights supersede the rights of others.  These

Christians demanded their religious standards and beliefs be written

into the law and be enforceable based on their interpretation of the

Bible. This despite the First Amendment of the Constitution, guaranteeing our individual right to be free to worship and free of a state sponsored religion.

Thus far, eight (8) Federal Courts have found section 3 of DOMA unconstitutional, this includes both the First and Second Courts of Appeals. Today was the second day of oral arguments before the Supreme Court in United States vs. Windsor. It is important to note, the Administration and the Justice Department refused to defend DOMA, John Boehner, Speaker of the House used House Rules to convene the Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group and subsequently hire a private law firm to defend DOMA before SCOTUS. I suppose the GOP just can’t let go.

Nevertheless, on to my real issue, where do these idiots come from? What rocks do these azzhats crawl out from under? Really, this one is presumably educated, talented, knowledgeable and highly respected in his field. This narcissist gives me a true case of the red ass I must say. He became the darling of the right wing simply by showing he had no class, by taking the President to task in a public forum; big f’ng deal you are classless. But then, so are most of those you are attempting to emulate you fit right in.

Let me just ask how did you get through medical school and not ‘believe’ in evolution? How do you teach at Johns Hopkins and not know the most recent findings on homosexuality?

How can you a presumably educated and compassionate person say this (3:40 is relevant to this)

Never mind, I know. Because you are so steeped in your personal prejudice, your personal bias you fail to step out of your box. I do not give two plugged nickels how many surgeries you perform successfully every year. Personally? I wouldn’t allow you to attempt to put the head back on my Barbie doll.

I think SCOTUS is going to find in favor of Ms. Windsor, I think they will find section 3 unconstitutional and strike down DOMA. This will mean we still have a very long ways to go, each state will still be putting the rights of our fellow citizens to a vote but it is at least one step in the right direction.

DOMA and the government report Justice Kagan referred to in her questions yesterday: http://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/CRPT-104hrpt664/pdf/CRPT-104hrpt664.pdf

Filed Under: Politics, Series: The Soapbox Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

Hell to the No

February 27, 2013 By 31 Comments

KickmThe American people are held in thrall to a bunch of highbinders, think this isn’t true, let’s explore together. The realities of our current politics, as a nation are so completely polarized we are unwilling or incapable of holding our own to appropriate standards. We accept from our own what we would burn down the house if the other side even mentioned. We make excuses for our own, accepting hyperbole in place of transparency and action.

Think this isn’t a problem consider the following:

  1. Indefinite detention continues, in fact has expanded to include the detention of American citizens.
  2. The Patriot Act is continued; in fact, the assault on Civil Liberties has expanded.
  3. War, war and more war we continue to send our troops into danger, in foreign lands. Despite promises to the contrary, we are still all in and our young men and women are serving not one, not two but sometimes three and more rotations.
  4. Gitmo is still open.
  5. Drone strikes and collateral damage of civilians, most especially to date 174 children. Now we kill without looking our enemy in the eye. War is becoming a game, assassination a YouTube sensation. The rules are expanding and soon Drones will be targeting a neighborhood near you.
  6. Supported and signed into law the National Defense Authorization Act of 2012 and 2013, one of the worst destroyers of Civil Liberties of Americans.

These are some of the issues as Progressives we should be concerned with. The US continues to expand its military presence, the defense budget is out of control and trillions of dollars are literally lost, why are we not demanding an audit? Are we honest? Did we fail to notice these problems, these expansions or do we simply not care as long as it is one of our own, not one of theirs.

Now let us move on to the new constant campaign. We cheer, the president is finally showing he cares about what we care about; he is showing he will fight back. Wait though, what is it he is talking about on this forever road trip to induce hwyl in the masses of his already fevered supporters.

  • Is he talking about VAWA?
    • With the exception of his State of the Union address on 12-Feb, the answer is no.
    • We, the American woman see our security, our place in society further eroded nearly every month as states slash and burn Aid to Families, Health Care, definitions of Rape and yes access to safe and legal abortion. The immoral Minority of the oh so Christian Right will soon turn us into a nation much like those we disdain and are fighting to free in the mountains of Afghanistan, hetaerism will be our standard we will be the first western nation to don the veil.
  • Is he talking about reasonable Gun Sanity laws?
    • With the exception of his emotional appeal on 12-Feb, again, no he isn’t talking about gun violence or gun sanity; this problem has been turned over to Joe Biden and members of Congress willing to be in targets.
  • Is he talking about reasonable solutions for the economy and sequester?
    • He is talking about the Sequester, he is campaigning hard on what the other side has not done and how the Sequester will hurt the nation. He is using his bully pulpit to make the other side look bad by their inaction.
    • The rubber meets the road on the economy and there is a presumption that elections have consequences. We should be demanding one of the consequences of this election is a conversation about jobs, not slash usgs_lineand burn of spending or deficit reduction at a time when frankly neither is called for.
  • Is he talking about campaign finance and fixing what is so clearly a problem?
    • The president and his staff have been unsurprisingly silent on this issue. Though his adherents clamor for changes, expect him to stand up for their principles and cross the bridge with them arm-in-arm against the tyranny of big money in politics, POTUS has not indicated his intention to do so.
  • Is he talking about voting rights and gerrymandering?
    • Is he trying to create ground support for any of the above issues with real solutions and specific steps the American Citizen can take? Our President invited Desiline Victor to the State of the Union, she drew the ire and several attempts at comedy by the talking heads of the other side of the house, however what was the real point. Is the Justice Department taking on Gerrymandering? Is this President using his Bully Pulpit to hammer home the message that each citizen of this nation has the right to a vote without compromise.
  • Is he talking about Immigration?
    • Not since his State of the Union, his impassioned statements aside our President has allowed his agenda to be set by the losers of the election.

What the POTUS is in fact doing during his constant campaign is pointing out he is powerless to do anything at all. He is showing us he is held hostage by Congress and thus must continue to campaign. What the constant campaign provides is the bully pulpit for the POTUS to continue what he is best at, communicating his high ideals (we love these) but hypobulic  when it comes to driving those ideas through a brassbound congress. We get the hypostasis of Barack Obama, what we don’t get is real substantive ideas put in front of Congress which the American People can latch on to and demand action be taken against.

I am a progressive, I have always been a progressive. It is my strong belief we must as a nation stand up, as citizens we must demand of all our representatives at every level of government they act in the best interest of this nation that is why we elect them and what they are paid to do. We cannot afford to give a pass to those who wear the same badge we wear, this includes the President of the United States. We may well like him, he may well be a moral and decent man. Does not matter a lick, he must do the job we hired him to do. Hysterogenic bully pulpits do nothing for us, fear, loathing has been the staple of politics for far too long we must demand better. We must demand real solutions to real problems.

Today Washington and Congress in particular is nothing more than a group houghmagandy party without the participants liking each other or wearing protection. This has to change.

The Hell to the No Words I liked

Highbinder

:

 corrupt politician
Hyperbole

:

 exaggeration
Hetaerism

:

 a state of society characterized by the holding of women in common
Hypostasis

:

 the substance or essential nature of an individual
Houghmagandy

:

 fornication
Hwyl

:

 fervor, excitement
Hypobulic

:

 weak-willed, lacking in will power
Hysterogenic

:

 inducing hysteria
Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Consistent Consent

February 9, 2013 By 33 Comments

justiceAs part of my Victim Impact volunteer work, I speak in Juvenile programs, a little over a year ago, I came out to one of my long-standing coordinators about my experience as a juvenile rape victim. Since that time, I have taken on a very difficult program, the juvenile sexual predators Victim Impact. The make-up of this group is tough:

  • 95% male, in fact to date I haven’t seen any girls.
  • All incarcerated, none are on probation or parole when they attend.
  • All under 18, the youngest I have had in a group is twelve (12).
  • All their cases have been adjudicated, some will release as inmates from Juvenile others will be moved to the adult system.

This is a delicate and often troublesome issue, one that crosses many boundaries. People from all walks of life, when asked have an opinion, yet many have not considered the disparities found state to state. There are variations on the theme, the age of consent is neither standard nor clear anywhere in this country, it differs depending upon the situation, for example:

  • South Carolina a female may consent at 14 a male 16, unless either is homosexual in which case they may never consent.
  • West Virginia males and females may consent to heterosexual encounters at 17 but must wait if they are homosexual until they are 18.
  • New York consent is 17 across the board no matter your orientation.
  • New Jersey law says at 16 you can consent without regard to orientation.
  • New Hampshire says that if you are heterosexual you are ready at 16 but have to wait till 18 if you are homosexual.
  • Montana claims that girls at 16 can consent but boys and homosexuals must wait till they are 18.
  • Texas says any person of 17 may consent. Texas has a built in Romeo and Juliet loophole of three (3) years, a DA or Judge may ignore if they choose. The other legal problem Texans have, sodomy for everyone is illegal, at any age; this includes all forms of non-vaginal sex.

The list goes on, state by state, the picture becoming clear. The lack of consistency nationwide places young men and women at risk. These risks include the possibility of becoming victims of predators or becoming victims of a legal system that could brand them as sexual predators for the rest of their lives. Why is this important? Why should we be bothered if predators are put away? Good question, I can answer that.

What about the Jimmy the high-school football hero? You know the one, he worked hard, studied hard, plays hard and hasn’t joined a gang. He caught the winning ball at the last game of the season. He has a shot at college and will be the first one in his family who might make it. You know him, we all have read stories about him. Well, he broke up with his girlfriend and she cried rape. Her father, mad at our hero called the courtesy bleacherreport.compolice and they took our high-school hero and his girlfriend’s claims of rape to the DA, who proceeded to prosecute. Now, instead of college Jimmy is sitting in Jail, when he gets out he will have be on the sexual predator list, for life.

This is the other side of the horror story currently unfolding in Steubenville, Ohio. This case has created a public outcry the facts around it though are not a case of consensual sex. This case is about rape, two of the minors involved go on trial in juvenile court on February 13.

I believe the Age of Consent laws are antiquated, they do not address the needs of our communities nor the realities of our society. We desperately need to ensure we have in place laws that are both unvarying and appropriate so children and young adults are protected wherever they might be and under whatever circumstances they might be in. Where once young people rarely traveled outside of their home town during their teenage years today they do so on a regular basis. Young people today frequently have access to their own credit cards, cell phones and transportation making the possibility of a trip outside their home state likely. Today it is easier to exploit a child than ever before. To ensure there is no question of the consequences of their choices it is critical national standards be in place, be communicated and be consistently administered.

Many today are concerned with states’ rights and the amount of power the federal government is ‘grabbing’, however, there are functions, such as this that would be best addressed by a national standard. As a society, we should consider what is important, what must take precedence; the protection of our next generation is one of those critically important issues. While the age of consent might seem a minor problem in comparison to other more weighty issues facing our country, consider the repercussions of not protecting our children. What will happen as those young unprotected children grow into adults?

I do not claim this single small thing, creating a national Age of Consent standard will stop the growing evil of predators. I do not claim it will suddenly balance the scales for our young people. However, I do believe if everyone understands the rules, our focus will shift to more important issues. With national standards we will start to see consistent prosecution of predators and we will stop seeing young lives ruined with inconsistent or absurd prosecution of laws that should never have been applied in the circumstances. We will start seeing the focus on other more important issues, education, reduction of teenage pregnancy, strengthening the foundation of the future.

Filed Under: Crime and Punishment, Sociology & Evolution Tagged With: , , , ,

My Anniversary Shots Fired

February 7, 2013 By 42 Comments

LVal_2010I looked out at thirty-three faces all staring back at me as I stood at the front of the room. Some young, some old, one woman the rest men. They did not want to be in this stuffy room sitting on those uncomfortable chairs. They didn’t have a choice, each one of them had been ordered into this room on this night for Victim Impact. Each one of them was a Texas Department of Criminal Justice Parolee; if they hadn’t signed in tonight, they could be revoked and returned to prison.

So there they slouched, White, Black, Brown; staring at me mostly I suspect hoping I would talk fast so they could fulfill this requirement and get the hell out of there.

“Tomorrow is my Anniversary.”

“Twenty-one years ago tomorrow, three young men decided for no good reason to try to take my life. Before I tell you the rest of the story we are going to play a game, it is called ‘What do you See’, so just shout it out when you look at me what do you see.”

This is their list; it took them a minute or so to get warmed up.

  • White Lady
  • Working Woman
  • Successful Woman
  • Educated
  • Well-Dressed
  • Rich
  • Articulate
  • Mean
  • Crazy Woman

Interesting isn’t it? I didn’t give them my list until much later. I did tell them my story though. I told them the story of what happened. I told them the story of what it did to my family. I told them how I felt when I found out the ages of the children who did such terrible harm to me, how I felt knowing they were going to prison.

I also told them a little bit about my own childhood, that it hadn’t always been rainbows, puppy dogs or easy. I told them about being declared a juvenile delinquent, being turned over to the state and being a runaway and on the streets at a very young age.

It matters they are not able to blow off the story of survival, compassion or Impact because of what they see when they look at me today.

I am not unkind, but I don’t pull punches about my feelings toward my attackers. I don’t lie about my feelings regarding their release either. Today I found something new, the reason why the youngest did his entire twenty, his complete sentence; his prison record was so bad he could never make parole. The one who was out and had his parole revoked, he was on the street less than a month, 28 days to be precise he is back in now. The last one, his parole was approved in October but he has not been released yet, he has nowhere to go.

Argicles.businessinsider Image

Articles.businessinsider Image

With each of these new pieces of information, I am torn. Torn between my wish they had made different choices. My wish they could find redemption. My true heartfelt wish they would or could be brought to the light and thus to a different manhood. Then there is the me that woke up this morning in pain again, the me that may face another surgery this year if the gym and physical therapy and acupuncture and everything else I am trying fails. There is the me that sometimes simply can’t get through the day without snapping for pain. There is the me that lies about seizures to keep people from worrying. There is the me who sometimes thinks I really will be alone someday because living with this me really isn’t a pleasant walk in the park.

When I look at this, these tears to my heart I have a very difficult time.

Whenever I speak at Victim Impact, I always allow for questions. I am always open and rarely am offended. Today I was offended, perhaps because things are close to the surface. Perhaps because tomorrow is my anniversary; but I think I was offended because it was simply an offensive exchange.

Sitting in the front row was a gentleman, perhaps in his forties who throughout the session had been fidgeting, rolling his eyes and clearly had something on his mind. Finally, he spoke up (this is paraphrased and not exact).

“Are you saying you never get angry, not even when you are in pain or when you have a seizure?”

“I did not say I am never angry, of course I get angry. I am human and have normal human reactions.”

“That is what I thought. So your interaction with the parole board to try to keep them inside is revenge!”

“No, it is not revenge. It is justice. For what they did to me, my family and their other victims they have never shown remorse. That lack of remorse or understanding means they will very likely do it again.”

“You threw them into prison, where it is insane, violent and terrible. You admitted they were children. You let them be turned into animals. Did you ever think about what they would become by keeping them there?”

“Yes, but what they did both before and after was not my choice it was their choice. They made these choices. At some point they have to take responsibility for those choices. They got time, I got life. Some day they will get out, they will choose what they do with the rest of their life. I don’t get to choose, my choices were taken away because of what they did. My life was shortened and changed because of what they did.”

At this point he started to argue but one of the host parole officers stepped in. In every crowd there is one like this. I don’t know why, there just is always one. The problem is there is a piece of me that will always wonder, always question my own heart. What if what he says isn’t at least in small part true, am I truly that terrible person who is only seeking revenge?

Tomorrow is my Anniversary. I am struggling with this.

My list:

  • Daughter
  • Grandmother
  • Mother
  • Wife
  • Sister
  • Aunt
  • Cousin
  • Friend

If you saw any of the above when you looked at me, your first instinct would not be to hurt me. That is why I stand up. That is why I do Victim Impact. Tomorrow it will be Twenty-One years since three young men and three bj-286x300bullets changed my life forever.

Filed Under: Series: Victim Impact Tagged With: , , , , ,

Insanity in the Face of Truth

January 31, 2013 By 32 Comments

Last night I watched two important testimonies to government bodies. As I watched these I pondered, with tears in my eyes and rage in my heart why we, as a nation, continue to have these discussions. I also considered the enormous strength of the individuals speaking while thinking to myself, I wonder what will the media, both mainstream and social reactions be to these testimonies be tomorrow. One final thought occurred to me, as I pondered the testimony of one … why the hell wasn’t he or any person from this great tragedy in Washington.

Can you guess the testimonies I am talking about? Can you guess the issue? I suspect you can, it is an issue I have spent time on in the past and one I am passionate about.

Gun Control, or as I like to think of it Gun Sanity.

One thing I thought as I watched the testimonies yesterday, why in the Hell was there not a single person from Newtown testifying in front of the US Senate, not a single solitary parent or first responder. No, instead they had this fool of a woman who made up stories from her vivid imagination and this million-dollar lobbyist for the death by bullet industry:

 Gayle Trotter, an ultra-conservative activist who before she took on the role of pro-gun fantasy weaver, she is also a card carrying member of the far right with not a single credential that would qualify her testimony. This is the same woman who in 2012 wrote on her website a scathing piece against VAWA. But you know, high capacity clips will solve the problem just shoot those thugs as they come through the door.

 Senate Judiciary Committee Hears From Prominent Voices On Both Sides Of Gun Control Debate
Wayne LaPierre, an ultra-conservative mouthpiece for the board membership of the NRA, he no longer even speaks for the majority of the paying membership. When listening to his Testimony one has to wonder, what the Hell he is doing there. Are these people sworn in? Do they swear to tell the truth or are they simply there reading from a script to provide their effing talking points. How does this man sleep at night?  article-lapierre-1221

By the way, they do swear to the truth, they are sworn in. I don’t understand how they are allowed to make up stories, fantasies out of their heads as part of their heads or asses as part of their testimony.

What brought me to my knees and then to my feet was to see Representative Gabrielle Giffords as she slowly walked to the front of the room. Each one of her words painfully spoken, challenging the room and her former peers to do something, to be brave for once to do the job they are elected to do. I thought to myself listening to her, who among us would be as brave as her, as strong as her? Who among us would survive what she has survived and stand before them and demand justice for a nation crying out for change. My tears of compassion for her and her husband flowed freely as I listened to her.

Her husband Mark Kelly testified directly after her testimony. He was fair, he was balanced. Both he and his wife are supporters of Gun Sanity and Gun Ownership. Mark Kelly spoke well, he didn’t make up stories. He was factual in his testimony. It is my suspicion his testimony will be given less weight than both Gayle Trotter and Wayne LaPierre.

Now to the one person who should have been heard but wasn’t invited. David Wheeler, the father of Ben Wheeler, a 6 year old child and one of the victims at Sandyhook Elementary. Mr. Wheeler testified at a public hearing held by the Connecticut legislature’s Bipartisan Task Force on Violence and Public Safety. I can only ask, why wasn’t he or any of the victim’s parents or first responders of Sandyhook invited to speak in Washington?

Here is his testimony.

I can only say this today, we must bring sanity to gun control. We must stop diverting our attention to what isn’t real and isn’t the truth. Wayne LaPierre wants us all to believe it is the “crazy” among us and so we should look over there, stop trying to control guns instead “control the ‘lunatics’”. This is simply a diversion tactic, the truth those with mental health issues are more likely to be victims of violence than to commit violence. Yes, we need to make certain we are providing help and support but this doesn’t address the core issue.

Mr. Wheeler made a profound statement and I want to paraphrase it here, the Declaration of Independence wasn’t accidental in its framing. The following is from that first of our documents, one those Gun Rights Advocates all too often forget:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed

That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

It seems we have perhaps in some of our wings gone too far today. There seems a belief the correct answer is armed insurrection rather than supporting our republic through debate and the democratic processes. It seems, based on the content of some of the testimony before the Senate Judiciary these small and frankly insane minorities and their nut job spokespeople now speak for all of us, their money and voice override ours.

I fear for us as a nation and a people when the loss of tens of thousands each year means nothing and our voice simply falters.

Filed Under: Guns & Violence, Society Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Primal Whisper-VAWA

January 4, 2013 By 53 Comments

I apologize for the length of this post. I hope you will read and consider passing it on. This is a personal story of Domestic Abuse. This is a personal appeal to anyone who reads this story to get active and demand justice for all members of society who are victims of Domestic Abuse. Demand Congress pass VAWA without changes to the current incarnation. Thanks

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1971, one year before it all began

1971, one year before it all began

In 1972, I was 15; I was first a ward of the state then a runaway, a street child then finally a ‘wife’. In 1972, I was the victim of domestic abuse that would continue for three years. Abuse both physical and emotional, that would strip me of my pride and humanity that would leave scars I bear on my body and soul and that would very nearly kill me.

In 1972, there were no laws to prevent a man from beating his wife. There were no Domestic Abuse Hotlines. There were no Safe Houses. There were no cool down periods, unless some cop took pity on you.

In 1972, the best you could hope for is either he would die of a heart attack while beating you or he would give you quick death. No one was going to help you and you had no rights, you were chattel.

I have written about this before, touched upon some of my experiences as a victim of domestic abuse in previous postings, here:

http://valentinelogar.com/2012/06/03/never-again-i-will-hate-you/

http://valentinelogar.com/2012/05/03/inside-domestic-abuse/

I have tried hard to stand up and say I am not a victim; I am a survivor of Domestic Abuse. The truth of the matter, for each of us who survived violence the truth is different. When our partner, our love, our spouse was throwing us against a wall, laying unloving hands upon us, kicking us when we were down painting our days and nights in pain and fear we were indeed Victims.

  • We were victims of the person who said they loved us.
  • We were victims of our destroyed ego, our fear and our great need to make it right.
  • We were victims of a society that did not see us in our desperate need.
  • We were victims of religious institutions that told us we must return to spouses who were nightmares.
  •  We were victims of financial systems that did not allow access credit and sometimes even banking in our own names.
  •  We were victims of law enforcement who were trained to walk away from ‘domestic’ situations.
  cuttingedgenews

Perhaps, if we are standing today and we are standing without that partner we are free, but I still remember. In my very bones, I still remember. It isn’t so much I remember his brutality, though it is hard to forget; I remember the police who walked away as I swayed in the middle of the living room barely able to stand upright. I remember them looking at me knowingly, staring at the bruises, the blackened eyes, the fat and bloody lip or the bald patch in my head. I remember them telling us to keep it down or telling him, ‘I had enough’.

I Had Enough. Were they judging the beating had gone on long enough? Were they judging the amount of blood or the number of visible bruises? I have always wondered about this, always wondered what code they were speaking, sometimes they laughed with him as he agreed to ‘keep it down’. These visits by the police, these drive-by stop in and calm down visits always earned me at least one more closed fist from him as he walked by, ‘See what you did? Why can’t you be quiet?’

domestic_violence-285x300

There was only one time, my husband this man who was supposed to love me went to jail. He didn’t stay long. It didn’t matter. For once my survival instinct kicked in and I used everything I had simply to grab that life preserver when it was thrown.

A little background –

  1. Texas in 1972 was still very backward about a great many things, marriage being one of them race relations being the other.
  2. My ‘marriage’ was common law, I wouldn’t find out for several years he didn’t have a legal hold on me though I still refer to him as my first ‘husband’.

The last terrible beating and the night my husband went to jail, it wouldn’t be the last beating just the last terrible one.

He had lost badly at a poker game that night, he did this often especially close to the time rent was due. For whatever reason, somehow, his losses were always my fault; I was always the target of his rage. It was the spring of 1974, I had learned by now never show emotion, never speak my mind and never react. It didn’t help; nothing could stop his need to lash out. That night was no different as he stumbled into the bedroom stinking of smoke and whiskey I could taste the beating to come, my body relaxed to absorb his fists.

‘Wake up you stupid bitch!’

Slam, into the wall. My head bounced twice, at least and my body slid down to the floor. He had picked me up from the bed and thrown me across the room, already first blood had been shed. I curled into myself, hoping this would satisfy him, the blood patch on the wall sometimes it was enough.

‘Dumb cunt, look what you did to the wall!’

Thwack, thwack again. His shoe caught me squarely in my ribs as I curled into myself. No more I thought. But, there was more to come. Already I was crying, tears and snot joining on my face as I tried to stand.

There were no more words now, just fists and feet. Furious, he beat me to the ground time and again and when I lay there as he panted above me, he would kick me demanding I stand up. Finally, when I thought, ‘No more, enough’, I did stand and I tried to run.

Running was the worst mistake I could have made, it triggered his predator instinct, he chased me out the door and into the front of yard. Before he caught me, he had grabbed a bat, one of those hollow aluminum ones. He  continued to beat me when I was down on the ground. Finally, after what seemed an eternity the police arrived, someone must have called them. I was on the ground, unrecognizable and he was standing above me panting. I still remember the conversation:

‘Sir, sir what are you doing? You have to stop!’

‘I have stopped; this is my wife I can do anything I want.’

‘Miss, is this your husband?’

‘No, I have never seen him before.’

As the handcuffs clicked closed, ‘You are under arrest…….’

‘Bitch, I am going to kill you!’

‘Sir, I suggest you calm down and be quiet.’

When the ambulance arrived, I was taken to the hospital. I had multiple broken bones including;

  • Broken jaw
  • Broken nose (third time)
  • Cracked cheek bone
  • Hairline fracture, skull
  • Four broken fingers
  • Seven broken ribs
  • Hairline fracture, pelvis
  • Internal bleeding
  • Plethora of contusions

He stayed in jail for 7 days until his Daddy sorted things out. I stayed in the hospital for 9 days.

Yes, I went back. For a time I went back. The psyche of women in these relationships is strange; we think if we only could fix ourselves, if we only did better they (the ones who so terribly harm us) would stop. It isn’t of course true but we have been so badly damaged we believe it. We don’t love ourselves. In not loving ourselves, we also lose the flight or fight reaction.

In 1972, there was nothing to save me. Police, had no resources and DA offices had no laws under which to prosecute unless we were fortunate enough to be killed. If we ran, if by some off chance our flight instinct kicked in the courts were against us, we ran with nothing, no resources and no access to resources.

oneinfourwomen

The Violence Against Women Act changed that. It has been over 700 days since this act expired. Women, men and children are at risk. The reasons for the Congressional GOP members to stand against this act are frankly their own ideological ignorance. This act has Bipartisan support and always has, this is the first time since 1994 this act has not been reauthorized; all because it expands services to under-served communities.

What you and I can do:

Contact your representatives in Congress and demand they pass the Violence Against Women Act as it stands today with expanded services: http://www.house.gov/representatives/find/

Other sources:

http://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/docs/vawa_factsheet.pdf

http://denisedv.org/what-is-the-violence-against-women-act-and-why-is-congress-playing-politics/

Filed Under: Women Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Hard Stop Sanity

December 21, 2012 By 57 Comments

If I haven’t visited you lately I apologize, I had a very difficult time processing my feelings after the tragedy of Sandy Hook Elementary this past Friday. I have watched social media for the week, watched friends and family make their personal stands on the issues of gun control, mental health and a host of other surrounding issues. This is a disclaimer, I am not a mental health expert, I am not an expert on the Constitution nor am I an expert on all the issues surrounding firearms, murder rates or suicide. I am a parent and a grandparent, I am a victim of violent crime, I am a survivor of domestic violence and I am a citizen of the United States. I care about living in a civil and sane society in the future and I care about the future of my children and grandchildren.

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At what point, then, is the approach of danger to be expected? I answer, If it ever reach us it must spring up amongst us; it cannot come from abroad. If destruction be our lot we must ourselves be its author and finisher. As a nation of freemen we must live through all time, or die by suicide.

Abraham Lincoln, Young Men’s Lyceum of Springfield, Illinois January 27, 1838

We are complicit through our inaction, through our fear and our refusal to acknowledge the issues we create through greed, ignorance and ideology. Yes, I said it we created the Hell that sees our children dying in their classrooms, in the streets, in the mall. We are responsible for this mayhem, this chaos this vicious cycle.

We are a nation of paranoids, a nation of victims wrapped in flags with Bibles in one hand and high capacity military grade weapons in the other. What are we afraid of? Oh sure, the government is tyrannical and somehow we must protect ourselves (hint: even with the weapons you have they have better ones). Of course, you need these high capacity clips and assault weapons to defend your home (hint: if you have fired 100 rounds in 30 seconds Bible&Gunsyou have likely killed your own family along with the bad guys and if they aren’t down you aren’t getting out alive).

We should not be quick to jump to conclusions, we should not be quick to slap that ‘insanity’ label on giving us the excuse to wipe our hands and carry on with our mundane lives. The truth is, most spree murderers are not clinically ‘insane’, do not have long-term psychiatric problems and are not psychotic. The make-up of the mass murder is changing, what isn’t changing is access to high-capacity magazines and military guns making the death toll higher.

The meme of those who demand their Second Amendment rights remain sacrosanct:

  • Guns don’t kill people Kill
  • 64,999,987 legal gun owners killed no one yesterday
  • Know guns, know peace and safety. No guns, no peace nor safety.
  • Gun control is hitting what you aim at.
  • The right to buy weapons is the right to be free.

Don’t you just love some of those? Yeah, me too they make me all warm and fuzzy; not.

In light of the tragedies of recent years, does the above stupidity hold weight? Can we honestly stand aside and allow our nation to continue to hold the record for death by gun violence among other high income nations, is this what we should be proud of?

Just a small slice

Just a small slice

I am pragmatic; the monster is already out of the box. We cannot fix what is already so tragically broken. We cannot change the minds or hearts of those who believe the only way to a Civil society is by arming themselves, arming school teachers, arming college students in their classrooms and dorms. We cannot change a society convinced they must be armed to the teeth, in their homes, their cars and walking the streets to protect themselves from the government, those violent ‘others’ they heard about or the zombie apocalypse.

Let’s start with some facts; I think it is important to make this a non-partisan issue:

  • Gun owners are both ‘Liberal’ and ‘Conservative’
  • When the Constitution was written, guns were breach load muskets single shot
  • Slave and Land holders wrote the Constitution; in fact, within the first ten amendments slavery is ratified. We do occasionally see the error of our ways and correct them, the Constitution was not written on stone tables by a lightning bolt shot from on high.
  • Anyone is able to purchase any type of firearm, including military grade semi-automatic rifles and handguns without a background check or waiting period in the secondary market (gun shows and private sales, including the internet). Forty percent (40%) of all legally purchased firearms are purchased this way.
  • Anyone can purchase as much ammunition in any clip size as they want without any tracking, registration or license on the internet.
  • Approximately 10,000 people are murdered every year in gun violence, many of them teenagers.

There are those who say their right to bear arms, their right to conceal carry, their right to own any weapon and any clip size is inviolate. They say armed rebellion would be the result of any attempt at Gun Control, they say SCOTUS has confirmed their right in District of Columbia v Heller to be armed and dangerous under any and all circumstances and without restraint.

This is what I say; I say there must be some middle ground that satisfies all of us. There must be some middle ground that stops the senseless deaths of our children and the murderous rampages in our public places.

This is what I believe must happen if we are ever to begin to heal this nation:

  • Require national registration
  • Demand Conceal Carry permits only in the following circumstance and make this a federal mandate:
    • Show true need (e.g. over the road truck drivers, certain security personnel, off duty police)
    • Attend regular training
  • Require same background check and waiting period in secondary market as in gun stores
  • Create national mental health registry
  • Update criminal background check registry to include domestic violence
  • Do not allow restoration of civil rights after time-served to allow gun purchase for violent criminals
  • Update background check to include Terrorist Watch List
  • Limit Clip Size to 10 rounds
  • Do not allow private purchase without background checks, make private sales illegal even between family members
  • Shut down internet sales of ammunition
  • Require gun safes in the home of all gun owners with children under 18
  • Raise the age limit to 25 for legal purchase and gun ownership
  • Require gun safety class before purchase
  • Change Stand your Ground laws to apply only to personal property / personal homes make this federal rather than state by state
  • Create a federal buy-back program to get illegal guns off the streets of our cities, give it two (2) years. Within the scope of the buy-back program, strengthen the laws and penalties for owning an illegal gun, selling a gun illegally and for using an illegal gun in the commission of a crime.

I don’t want to take your guns. I want sanity and safety. I would rather not call it gun control, I would rather call it Gun Sanity. These days I am afraid to go to the theater, the mall or anywhere else. If you are a gun owner, frankly I am afraid of you. Is this really the world any of us want?

http://www.academia.edu/1199492/Hegemonic_Masculinity_and_Mass_Murderers_in_the_United_States

http://www.bradycampaign.org/facts/gunviolence?s=1

http://fivethirtyeight.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/12/18/in-gun-ownership-statistics-partisan-divide-is-sharp/

http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/datablog/2012/jul/22/gun-homicides-ownership-world-list

Filed Under: Guns & Violence, Society Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I weep for America

December 5, 2012 By 37 Comments

soapboxpileOnce again, the United States falls short of their previous greatness. Once again, we have successfully shown the world what we have become. What is that you ask, well you should.

  • Narrow minded
  • Bigoted
  • Fearful
  • Small

As I watched the vote yesterday the vote on the UN Convention for the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, I wanted to weep. Well, let me be clear I wanted to weep only after I wanted to stomp into and through the halls of the Senate and shake those 38 Senators who voted ‘Nay’, when given the opportunity to ratify the Convention (Treaty) of Rights of Persons with Disabilities.

I watched as Senator Elizabeth Dole wheeled her husband, the elder statesman Bob Dole onto the floor of the senate. He supported the ratification of this Treaty, he had only been released from Walter Reed 5 days earlier but thought it important to come that day to show his support. It wasn’t enough.

Senate Floor, December 4, 2012

Senate Floor, December 4, 2012

I watched as two normally pugnacious foes stood up for the same thing, to ratify this Treaty. John Kerry and John McCain both spoke from the floor of the senate yesterday on the same side of the fight. Both Senators spoke from their experience as wounded war veterans; both spoke from their hearts and were compelling.

I watched as the vote called, I was dismayed after that I was furious. If you don’t know the history of the UN Convention for the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, here it is in brief.

  • Adoption by General Assembly, December 2006 (modeled after the 1990 US Americans with Disabilities Act signed by President George H.W. Bush)
  • Opened for Signature, March 2007
  • First Session of Committee, February 2008
  • Entry into Force, May 2008
  • First Conference, October – November 2008
  • Signed by President Barack Obama, July 2009
  • Second Conference, September 2009

The Senate had the opportunity to ratify a Treaty that required nothing of us as a nation, no changes to our laws no changes to our systems. The Senate had a chance to show the world we are not the narrow minded, fearful conspiracy nuts we appear to be, no thanks to Rick Santorum and the rest of the Tea Party nutcases, they failed.

Let’s talk about Rick Santorum, who is now a featured columnist for World News Daily, home of some of the best conspiracy theories, the most egregious of the Birther theories, the ongoing climate denial and my favorite the ongoing fear mongering of Islam and Socialism combination. Yes, Rick fits right in with these lunatics. The thirty-eight idiots in the Senate who voted ‘Nay’ adopted his UN Black Helicopter conspiracy about this particular Treaty, his leap of giant faith that somehow ratifying this treaty would usurp parental authority.

So, here we are once again proving to the world we are nation in decline. We are a nation without a moral compass, one that no longer values even our own accomplishments in leading the world. The Tea Party wins, even those Senators who in the past have voted their conscious have been beaten into submission, fearful of losing their place at the table.

America I weep for you, I weep for all of us.my.opera

Link to the Treaty: http://treaties.un.org/doc/source/RecentTexts/IV_15_english.pdf

Who has signed, ratified: http://www.un.org/disabilities/documents/maps/enablemap.jpg

Filed Under: Series: The Soapbox Tagged With: , , , , ,

No Restraint

November 21, 2012 By 44 Comments

Paul Ryan, the other half of the Romney ticket is an adherent of Ayn Rand and her watershed novel Atlas Shrugged. If you haven’t ever read Atlas Shrugged, you might wonder why this is so frightening and so at odds with his Catholic faith. The problem with the philosophy of Ayn Rand when applied to nations is its failure of compassion. Ayn Rand believed in Free Markets above all else, Free Markets and individualism. The philosophy of objectivism and selfishness, says the wealthy the “makers” have value and worth in society. Others, the “takers” have none. The entire premise of Atlas Shrugged is a nation, no, a world gone mad as the “makers” withdraw their resources leaving the “takers” to their own inept devices, incapable of managing without the direction and firm hand of those at the top in wealth and resource. This premise is of course faulty, it assumes the 95% without great wealth are incapable and unintelligent, but this was the assumption of Ayn Rand and it is also the assumption of Paul Ryan and his cohorts.

Paul Ryan would be Libertarian, except the Libertarian platform allows for the decriminalization of Drugs, Abortion and Gay Marriage. Otherwise, most of the Libertarian platform is based on the Ayn Rand philosophy of Free Market without regulations, no taxes and no government supports or safety nets. The other problem for Paul Ryan and those of his ilk, within the houses of Congress, those within the various state legislatures and within the various Governorships; well they simply can’t win without the support of their far right Christian coalitions today. Ayn Rand was an Atheist and the Libertarians believe strongly in keeping religion out of government but individual rights to worship protected from interference.

Paul Ryan’s budget, yes that infamous piece of tripe, the basis of the platform of the Republican Party the ineptly named Path to Prosperity, which has been vetted and rejected by every non-partisan group is based on the philosophies of Ayn Rand and the premise of Atlas Shrugged. It is nothing more or less than a GIFT to those who have no need and a THEFT from those who have great need. The GOP having failed to take heed of the results of the people’s choice in the most recent election have made Paul Ryan their lead negotiator for the next round of Budget talks. We will fall over the Fiscal Cliff; buckle up.

The real issue though, the real problem with all of this is the idea of Free Markets, markets without restraint or restriction. History is a strange thing, we forget if not constantly reminded. We jump up and down with glee, say hallelujah, amen give me unrestrained markets and let them go where they will. We say, Drill baby drill and bring down the cost of gas at the pump. We say, a person or corporation (oh forgive me I forgot they are persons too) should be able to do anything, say anything without restriction, restraint or regulation. We forget, perhaps we want to forget we have been down this road and brought this nation to its knees.

This is one result of the Free Market with no restrictions.

Image from the Dust Bowl, man-made disaster

Want to know about the Dust bowl? The disaster brought about by greed and unrestrained commodity markets, in this case wheat, do some research on the Dust Bowl. It took FDR investing in research and re-development of the region to change the Dust Bowl disaster. I recommend watching the PBS special now airing http://www.pbs.org/kenburns/dustbowl/

Seattle Hooverville, Great Depression

These tent cities were built outside of most large cities across the nation during the Great Depression. People thrown from their homes and migrating to find work, sound familiar? What brought on the Great Depression? All the money and resources held by a very small contingent and unregulated banking. It took a world war, horrifying loss of life and Glass-Stegall and the Securities and Exchange Act to bring an end to the Great Depression.

Cuyahoga River burns due to chemicals and pollution

Unrestrained the Cuyahoga River burned. Chemicals had been dumped for years and finally this river along with others showed the world what happens when man pays no attention.

Just one sign, unrestrained and state supported

Until 1964 business could do whatever they like, whether using public or private lands. Got an idea? Theater, restaurant, how about a water fountain in the deep south? No matter what it is, you only need provide it to White Folks, they are human the rest of humanity not so much. That was the reasoning of Jim Crow and it was not only allowed it was supported by law. Libertarians believe and it is stated in their platform; racism, sexism and gender orientation are perfectly legitimate reasons for bias and any business owner should be allowed to place a sign in their window, like this:

December 2011, Ohio

That date isn’t wrong, in fact both Ron and Rand Paul supported this business owners position.

Floating Pacific Trash Island

It is estimated the floating trash island in the Pacific is bigger than the state of Texas. It is made up mostly of plastics and destructive to sea life. Man could change this, we could replace nearly all plastics with Industrial Hemp products, instead we allow the natural product which has no pharmaceutical use to remain a controlled substance requiring a license to grow from the DEA. It is estimated there are at least 25,000 products possible to make from Industrial Hemp, many of these can be found in the Floating Trash Island.

BP Deepwater spill

This wasn’t the first and it likely won’t be the last as drilling continues off every shoreline where the potential for fossil fuels exist. With minimal regulation or oversight and massive profits just waiting to be pumped to the surface, why worry if a fuel lives are lost. Right?

This is the world, the world of Ayn Rand, Paul Ryan and Free Markets without oversight, regulation or restrictions. But is this the world we want? I can only say this isn’t the world I want to leave for my children or grandchildren.

Filed Under: Politics, Series: Platforms & Ideologies Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,
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