Fall Flash 7

Ruthie lay as if sleeping, peaceful like. She was beautiful in her Sunday-go-to-meeting dress, her white gloves and her hair all done up just the way she liked it.

Harold sat in the front, hands together and head bowed. Lovely Ruthie he thought, how I loved you.

“Don’t worry Harry; I’ll be just around the corner waiting for you.” Harry smiled quietly to himself as he heard her whispered words and the casket closed.


Flash in the Pan is brought to you by the amazing Red of M3 fame, to join in the fun read the rules at the link provided and get to flashing!

The Flash word is Around . The word limit is 75 words. This one comes in at exactly 74.

Hashtags: #flashfiction #getpublished with @RedmundPro

Summer Sun

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWhen all you have isn’t enough, then what?

When everything you are isn’t good enough, then what will be good enough?

When your entire history is poured on the ground and the only thing you can make is mud pies, should you plan to forever go hungry?

Someone once said to me, “You won’t live to thirty”. Yet here I am I lived past fifty.

Someone else once said to me, “I will kill you”. Yet, here I am alive. They didn’t succeed in killing me though they damned near broke my spirit.

Another person said to me, “You will never amount to anything, you are stupid”. I believed them for years and let their judgment dictate my direction and choices.

I approach my next birthday, sooner than I like to think and I consider the consequences of my choices. Pardon me while I wallow in a fair bit of self-pity, maybe not self-pity so much as ‘well shit, what next’. I stare down this slope of the unknown and consider options:

–          What is next for this last third of my life?

–          Why am I asking who I am at this late date?

–          Should I even care about definition or instead just get to living as best I can?

If you could, would you say despite not being enough, not being good enough, despite dust turning only to mud, I am still grateful. My heart is full of gratitude I have lived, I am alive and my eyes have beheld great beauty, my soul 013has burst with laughter and I have trod paths both new and ancient searching for nothing more than passages to joy. I have risked my heart more than once, because well because I am a romantic and despite I have had the ever-loving shit stomped out of me more than once I still believe in love. Despite a tough as nails exterior, despite scars, not just on the inside but some prominent ones on the outside, I am still somewhat mushy and sometimes all too forgiving of the failure of others to take care of the gifts I freely give.

I often accept hurtful words and judgments of ‘less than’ and ‘not enough’ as the truth. I often absorb these through my skin and into my heart. I allow these judgments, harshly rendered to send me into myself searching for different truths or forgiveness. I reach outward sometimes-begging forgiveness for harm unintended, other times for harm never done but easily identified as mine.

Hard to believe anything but early judgments even after all this time of fighting for new definitions. Yet still I will live my life with a grateful heart for all the gifts of light, laughter, joy and pathways to victorious survival against great odds. We might not always be warrior queens, perhaps it is enough sometimes we simply find a sunny spot and be thankful for the color yellow and the warmth at noon.

Am I crazy? Maybe just a little. Am I still a romantic, seeing the world through rose colored glasses? Yes, I suppose I am. The truth? I suppose the truth is, still after all this time I simply want to be loved just as I am, flawed, scarred by a life I didn’t ask to live but lived in the best way I could.

That is all, just loved; perhaps after all that was and is too much.

Fall Flash 6

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

It burned hot. Flames had reached up to what seemed the moon and stars. She could hear the glass in the windows cracking from the heat of that fire. The children thought it was pretty and watched as it ravaged the only home they knew, not understanding what it meant.

The Fire Department never arrived, she couldn’t pay, not since he left and services were privatized for her part of town.

They watched it burn.


Flash in the Pan is brought to you by the amazing Red of M3 fame, to join in the fun read the rules at the link provided and get to flashing!

The Flash word is Left . The word limit is 75 words. This one comes in at exactly 75.

Hashtags: #flashfiction #getpublished with @RedmundPro

Fall Flash 5

“Dammit, I did it again.”

Jannelle stared at the crumpled garage door. She wondered how she would explain to her father who had just replaced the last one she ruined. It really wasn’t her fault she thought to herself.

First Tooty called, then Davy texted her, then Bobby called and she had to have a three way with him and Tooty.

How could she remember not to move forward into the door during all that?


Flash in the Pan is brought to you by the amazing Red of M3 fame, to join in the fun read the rules at the link provided and get to flashing!

The Flash word is Forward . The word limit is 75 words. This one comes in at exactly 75.

Hashtags: #flashfiction #getpublished with @RedmundPro

Fall Flash 4

“I find you guilty of murder; do you have anything to say before your sentencing?”

The judge stared down at the woman before him, his eyes shooting sparks of hot fury. He was clearly prepared to throw all the books at her.

She stood straight, proud in her orange. In clear, ringing tones so all could hear her, she said, “I was right to kill him, he beat me ten times. You let him go ten times to beat me again, the eleventh time I stood my ground.”

The courtroom gasped.

“I sentence you to Life, without Parole.”


Flash in the Pan is brought to you by the amazing Red of M3 fame, to join in the fun read the rules at the link provided and get to flashing!

The Flash word is Right . The word limit is 100 words. This one comes in at exactly 100.

Hashtags: #flashfiction #getpublished with @RedmundPro

Flashes from the Bistro

Have I mentioned the latest Flash compilation from Redmund Productions is available for sale? No? Shame on me!

Flashes from the Bistro Click me to Buy me

Flashes from the Bistro
Click me to Buy me

The latest Flash in the Pan: From the Bistro is available!

If you enjoyed the summer flashes from me, you will truly enjoy the 250 flashes in this book, a compilation from 26 authors some from across the web and some direct submissions. There are some talented and imaginative storytellers in this series, some you know and some who are new for the summer edition all of them make this book a winner.

Let your imagination run free with stories to delight, scare, disturb and amaze.

Available in Paperback, Kindle, E-book and PDF, there is something for everyone. I got mine the day it was released, but then this is the first time I made the cover (I was so excited).

Join me at the Bistro!

Silent Spaces

A house in the Woods

A house in the Woods

I am alone, often. Don’t mistake this as a cry for company, I like my silent spaces and will paint them in deeper silence more frequently than I realize. I am I think strange in liking my silent spaces, no television, no background music, no white noise to distract me; only me, the clacking of my nails on the keyboard and occasionally the roll of my lighter as I fire a cigarette, or a candle.

I have always been this way, always liked the silence the quiet of empty beaches with only the waves for company. I have always liked mountaintops in the winter with only the crunch of snow as your feet break through icy top layers or you slide across the top during a solitary run on slick ski’s. I was always able to dance in a silent studio, without music except what I heard in my heart my body following a rhythm all its own.

Don’t mistake me, I like people truly I do like people in small doses. I enjoy a night out with friends; a great meal with magnificent wine is my idea of a fabulous way to spend money and time. Given the right cornersoftheroomgroup of women (or men) I could sit up all night and talk, I know this is true I have done it. With some people, I can spend hours on the phone and have far ranging conversations that touch on nearly every aspect of life, from children to government misconduct. I am not I don’t think a hermit.

Nevertheless, I love my silent spaces and have never felt the need to fill them. As I have grown older, I feel as if I am growing in. I am looking for balance; you know that ever-elusive balance we all seek in life between our mental, emotional and physical well-being and what the world requires of us. The requirements of paying the bills, keeping a roof over our heads and the lights on and if you live in one of the hot as Hades during the summer months keeping the air conditioning pumping, at least at a reasonable temperature so you don’t look like the Wicked Witch of the West or the Polar Ice Cap, you know…melting.

Growing in, what does that really mean? For me it means I am finding myself less and less likely to be tolerant of the bad behavior of others, this is especially true of what I perceive as the ‘entitlement’ syndrome. What is this you ask; well you should ask as this it is a growing phenomenon within society today. There are many infected and this nasty and pernicious disease of the soul spreads into both their personal and professional interactions touching all they touch and leaving an oily residue behind.

Growing in, I find what it means is I am unwilling to sell myself short or cheaply. What was acceptable even five years ago is not any longer “just part of the package, just part of the business”. I have ten, maybe fifteen years left to work, I love what I do, at least I use to truly love what I do. I worked very hard to carve a niche for myself in what had always been a man’s world, I had put in my time and when I say this I don’t just mean the years I mean the 70 hour work weeks and the millions of air miles. I now find I am truly unwilling to accept the disdain from some asshat recruiter who calls me with an opportunity but then has the nerve to say the following to me:

“Would you be willing to pay your own expenses to Philadelphia for a face-to-face interview?”

This for a 4-month project!

Then had the nerve to say to me, “Your rate is too high, I can find someone for half that price at an all-inclusive rate.”

“No, no you cannot, not with my level of experience, not with US Citizenship which you stated is a requirement and not with my references. But you know you should go ahead and try, call me back when they screw up the project my rate is double when I do project remediation.”

Yes, I did say that. I don’t know if that particular recruiter understood half of my response, however since it was in writing he can look up the big words.

perfectly silent and stunning

perfectly silent and stunning

Growing in, I find has created a great big question mark in my life. That question mark is leading me down the path of questioning what I really want to be and do right now and for the remainder of my productive / working life. What are the other things I truly care about and that matter to me? My independence in work, yes that matters. Being able to take time to myself, yes that matters. My silent spaces, yes that matters a great deal. The questions though are these:

Does my independence trump stability, focus and being able to chase other important dreams?

I am alone, often. This is not a complaint, not a cry for company. I like my silent spaces. I like my growing in. I like I am questioning my new places and maybe yet again reinventing myself, what I don’t like is I am being forced to this by an environment unkind to people like me, people of a certain age, certain gender, certain type; people who are growing in like me.

Never Judge

Where else but the Southern United States would a magazine named Garden & Gun find a readership? Yes, you read correctly Garden & Gun.gardengun1

Pretty isn’t it.

When I first saw this magazine at my local Central Market, just sitting in the rack waving at me, I stared, mouth likely hanging open. I was flabbergasted I was stunned! Truthfully, I nearly burst out in laughter right there in the check-out line, thinking to myself, “nowhere else but here would anyone think to create such a shiny, beautiful magazine named Garden & Gun, nowhere but here in the South, because nowhere but here in the Southlands of the USofA would anyone think this goes together like milk and cookies!”

Gotta get me a UZZI to kill me some varmints’ dagnabit!

If you know me at all, even a little bit you know despite the rather pricey $5.99 cover I simply had to make the purchase, had to know what was inside. There truly wasn’t anything on the cover, other than the name itself that hinted at the ‘real’ contents, what could possibly be inside? Oh, oh my not only do they have a print magazine all glossy and beautiful, they have an electronic delivery of their super-duper Garden & Gun (don’t you just love the juxtaposition of those words).

Here I am, eating from my wonderful fruit salad I made yesterday, all this wonderful fresh goodness and perusing my Gardens & Guns expecting the worst. Imagine my surprise; it wasn’t at all gardengun3 what I expected. Sure, there were advertisements’ for sport shooting at, well those clay things hurled in the air. But there were also beautiful garden pictures, spectacular recipes like the one on page 44 for Tomato Pie (yum), music reviews, book reviews, walks through fabulous houses, humor and so much more. All of it done well, written really well and the pictures, my oh my, the pictures some of them are simply stunning.

So this was a surprise, one that led me to the online magazine just to take a quick peek. What I found was some more of the same. To put things in perspective, this is what is on offering at Garden & Gun, online which pretty closely follows their print magazine.


This one I just had to share with you all: http://gardenandgun.com/article/letter-harper-lee

I am going to admit, it is highly unlikely I will subscribe to Garden & Gun. I am simply not a hunting, sport shooting or fishing fancier and there is plenty of this in the magazine. I started out, when I bought this magazine at the check-out stand, when it was waving me down, screaming at me; well I started out with the plan to be ugly, knowing I would be able to write ugly, snarky things about the magazine and my beloved Southlands and those who inhabit this diverse and wonderful part of our nation. I started simply knowing only here could you combine Gardens and Guns and come out with something truly obnoxious and disturbing that others would find worth reading. Kickm

I was wrong, this truly is well done.

So much for my preconceived notions, what do they say? Oh, yes that’s right…..Never Judge A Book by its Cover.

Nouns Improperly

Is it a “War on Women”? Certainly, with all the new legislation being suggested and in many cases passed within some states if feels as if we, that is women, are under constant barrage. The other day though I ran across a story in Addicting Info among other sites, while the story was horrifying (read it for yourself here http://www.addictinginfo.org/2013/08/04/caught-on-camera-police-in-texas-violated-young-girls-during-routine-traffic-stop/) what followed had me laughing for nearly two hours.

If you are easily offended, I would suggest you stop reading what follows, as I said I found it hysterically funny, others might not.

Not laughing at her, with her

Not laughing at her, with her

It all started with a man commenting on how horrible the entire incident of the roadside search of the two women in the story was. It was indeed terrible, worse than terrible, it was a body cavity search conducted in full view of anyone driving by, without any consideration for the health of the women, their privacy or the emotional trauma. It was by any reasonable persons assessment and by the letter of the law, both rape and oppression. The man commenting was trying to be both sensitive to the issue and to the audience, his comment was along the lines of the following (I paraphrase as I didn’t copy).

This is terrible; the cop actually touched their butt and then their vagoo.

Well yes, the cop did just that and yes, it was terrible. But apparently, the next person to comment didn’t think it was near as terrible as this nice man using the incorrect term for female nether parts. For this, she was quite incensed and stepped right in to correct him.

It is a VAGINA. Not a Vagoo. Do you have a problem with VAGINA?

Now I thought this vehemence wasn’t called for, but then I am politically incorrect about so many things. I don’t have a problem with Vagina, but I didn’t have a problem with Vagoo either. What followed were one hundred and eighty-five (185) people who chimed in to add their pet names for the wayward VAGINA. Now and then, our friend would return to admonish the mostly women, eventually she gave up. I wish now I had linked to the actual thread, it is a scream and a half.

I present to you now, the cleaner names offered up for Vagina. Some I suspect are actually personal pet names; others are names I have heard over the years. This is dedicated to my sister and dear friend Red, who is a stickler for proper naming conventions and who I suspect would have been bouncing off the walls as I laughed even harder!

Squish Mitten Vagoo Vaj Hoo-He
Lady Parts Lady Town YooHoo Vagingo
Special Lady Garden Va-Jay-Jay Bajingo Love Grotto
Woohoo Nilly Biscuit Fuzzy Taco Love Box
Honey Pot Twinkle Cave Sexy Time Cootie Cat
Vajinglejangle Promised Land Lady Box Pearly Gates
Muff Tunnel Cooze Hootie Cat Wahoo
Foof Punani (Caribbean) Pum Pum (Caribbean)

Coochiesnorcher      (Vagina Monologues)

Petunia Hoo Hoo
(Boys on the Side)
Poontang Muffin (Betty White)
Flower of Life, Georgia O'Keefe

Flower of Life, Georgia O’Keefe

Do you wonder how many names (other than actual given names and Carlos Dangerous) might be floating about for man parts, that is the Penis.

I loved these; some of them simply slay me. What do you think, funny or just strange.

I know the rest of the story is terrible, I could have raged about this story across three or even four posts. My state (yes, it happened in Texas) is getting crazier every single week. This is one of several stories just like it; the victims filed a lawsuit. One of the officers has been fired (the woman), another is back on the job, seriously why should we be surprised. The victims have agreed to a settlement. None of this solves the problem though, does it?

Fall Flash – III

Many thought Tasha ravishingly beautiful; she thought they were blind to her true assets. Tasha wanted more; she had a plan to progress her goal.

Today her heels beat a staccato tattoo on waxed wood floors, announcing her arrival. Heads turned to follow her and then shook dismayed as she made her way toward the double doors. Tasha pushed with just the right pressure, collective breaths caught upon seeing her standing framed in the doorway.

“You can’t be here”, the older man said as he stood.

“Bitch!” A young woman mumbled.

“Daddy, I only want to meet the family.”


Flash in the Pan is brought to you by the amazing Red of M3 fame, to join in the fun read the rules at the link provided and get to flashing!

The Flash word is Progress . The word limit is 100 words. This one comes in at exactly 99.

Hashtags: #flashfiction #getpublished with @RedmundPro

%d bloggers like this: