Why I Hate It

Cowgirls have To-Do Lists

Cowgirls have To-Do Lists

Why I hate to travel, all the time and every single time I do it. After nearly a year of not traveling, I had forgotten just how much I truly hate to travel. I spent more than twenty years as a road warrior, every week on the road, Sunday night out and usually, if I was fortunate Thursday night back home with Fridays spent catching up on expense reports, conference calls and all the rest of business activities necessary to keep my life in order. This was my life for over twenty years. I wanted out, I made a conscious decision to get out, that did not quite work. Now I am reminded why I wanted out.

All the reasons why I Hate Travel, in no particular order.

There is the schedule itself usually dictated by clients leaving you with approximately 16 waking hours unless previously scheduled on Friday to see; doctors, hair stylists, manicurists, dentists, friends and family. Of course, did I fail to mention during this short time home there are also things screaming for your attention such as house cleaning, laundry and shopping because frankly whether or not there is a spouse or family one still must have at least some food in the house and in my experience, no one but me is ever going to put it there.

Why do I Hate Travel? Because this is absolutely no way for a normal person to live, it is not romantic, it is not exciting and it surely does not make me at all happy.

Let’s talk about hotels, just for a brief moment. When you travel for business you are not staying in Five Star hotels, no most of the time you are staying in chains, sometimes they are fallen stars. If you are like me, you only have a few 170380_13053106480012593076_STDrequirements some these days are harder to meet than others. I don’t want to leave my room in the middle of the night for a cigarette, don’t hate me I smoke and believe I should be able to do so in the privacy of the room I am paying for. But let’s talk about the rest, shall we? Starting with closets without enough hangers and those f’ng hangers that do not come off the rack, I am constantly fighting them. Then there are the mattresses, has anyone ever slept in a hotel and gotten a good night’s sleep, I toss and turn all night and wake every morning feeling like I have run an Iron Man. As a coffee drinker, I ask only one thing please, leave me more than one small packet of real coffee; I have learned to ask for more on check-in and every single night when I arrive back. Then there are the dangerous as all hell shower/baths, why in all that is holy don’t hotels simply install showers stalls rather than these tubs with showerheads? Narrow tubs, no traction and add to this flimsy curtains that stick to your skin actually climbing into your crevices when you are trying to bath, gad I hate bathing in hotels.

Finally, why do I Hate Travel so completely and entirely?

Airports and flights, it is getting worse and worse. No matter where I travel, I notice the ‘cost cutting’ measures first, the lack of human interaction when checking in. If you need assistance, you had better plan on a long wait. Then there is Lines form at the security line at Denver International Airport at as the TSA works to clear passengers for their flights.TSA and the security process, come on boys and girls, you have anywhere from 3-5 lines you could open up and you have a line of people waiting to get through security, tell me again why is only one of the lines open? By the way, please explain to me why I have to take my computers out, my shoes off, my coat off, my sweater off; damn do you want me naked? By the way when it comes to TSA, could we please have a line for seasoned travelers and another for those who are on vacation with families, I know very elitist of me but really the next time I am behind a family of four struggling with children, strollers and too much carry-on luggage I think I will scream, loudly.

Finally, we get to the airlines and the flights themselves. They are in another round of cost cutting and they are idiotic in their methodology. I can only talk about the one I fly the most often, bet you can guess given I live in the Dallas area. Now I have flown this airline for most of my career, I am a Million Miler on them, retain my Gold status for life even if I never fly again. In truth I have flown more than 1.5 million miles on this airline alone, this doesn’t count other airlines, all together between the four primary airlines I fly I have well over 2 million air miles, this means miles I have flown not all the additional miles I collect in other ways. The benefit of being an ‘Elite’ member of the club is upgrades when they are available, when they aren’t the flights are even more miserable. These days though even First Class flights are fairly low class, there is no service unless you ring your bell repeatedly and demand attention from the apathetic attendant’s, there is no meal service for any flight under 2.5 hours, even if that flight is during the dinner hour, if you are lucky they will throw you a bag of peanuts. Drinks are served in plastic cups, coffee in paper.

Don’t get me started on Coach where you are kicked in the back, stuffed together as if you are an anchovy and must keep your elbows so close to your ribs you can’t breathe for an entire flight. Service? Forget about it.

So far, no flight has left on time and thus no flight has landed on time!

Now I remember I hate travel; truly, I do. I want a real life. I want to be home after a day at work. I want to write and read, sleep in my own bed. I want the opportunity to have dinner with friends, family or someone I love. Hell, I want to enjoy travel because I am going someplace romantic to get away from it all.

Just a slice of life!

Atrocity, the Rubber Broke


Spice is nice but Incest is Best’.

I wish they wore protection, you know put a raincoat on it to prevent conception.

Next up on the hit parade: Ferguson Police Chief Tom Jackson


On 9 August 2014, Darren Wilson murdered 18-year-old Michael Brown this truth is undisputed. Darren Wilson did not need to murder him, his life was not in eminent danger; Michael was not charging him or attacking him. On 9 August 2014, 18-year-old Michael Brown, who would have started college in two days, lay on the streets of Ferguson, Missouri dead for four hours while those who loved him, including his mother, were kept away from his young body. In days past, during Jim Crow days, during the days of slavery this type of action was done as a warning to others of what could happen to them if they stepped out of line.  On 9 August 2014, 18-year-old Michael Brown’s dead body was covered with a tarp and loaded into the back of an SUV for transport to the Medical Examiners, four (4) hours after he had been shot to death by Officer Darren Wilson.

Timeline Available Here


There are so many people involved in the clusterfuck that is Ferguson, MO. So many that are responsible for just how bad it truly is there. Everyone, from the Governor on down has a hand in the horror show that is St. Louis and Ferguson. Nevertheless, the real sideshow is in the lap of the Ferguson Police Chief Tom Jackson, who simply doesn’t know when to shut up.

the bad players

On 10 August, Police Chief Tom Jackson reneged on his responsibilities and allowed the County Police Chief Joe Belmar to speak for him. Did he know his officer had begun the firestorm that would continue through to today? Personally, I doubt it; I don’t think any of them are that smart. I think simply Chief Jackson, along with all the rest of them simply don’t care enough about the community he is in charge of to get up off his lazy azz. Furthermore, I think he needed to get his ducks in order; he needed to make certain he had the ‘Trayvon Martin’ defense fully in place for his officer before he got in front of the cameras so he allowed others to do what he was too lazy to do.

Our ‘friendly’ community servant, Chief Jackson didn’t show his face on the scene, didn’t open his mouth to the press until 15 August, six (6) days after the murder of Michael Brown. Six days ya’ll. At this point in the timeline of Ferguson, there has been civil unrest, military style policing and more; including Ferguson police showing up without their badges to intimidate peaceful protesters.

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Chief Jackson had shown his true colors with this first public appearance though, first announcing the name of the officer who murdered 18-year-old Michael Brown, then defending his actions. Chief Jackson by this time had all his ducks in a row, Ferguson had lined up their lies. Michael Brown was being painted as a ‘thug’, a dope fiend pothead and a violent criminal who deserved to be gunned down in the street and left in the sun for four hours. Between the questionable video tape from the store that had never called the police, to the highly questionable timeline of events that was never substantiated by any witness other than the officer who gunned down Michael Brown, to the debunked pictures of the beaten Darren Wilson…… Ferguson Police Chief Jackson has been nothing if not gas on the flame that is Ferguson.

When you add the policing of Ferguson since the murder of Michael Brown, I can only assume, with good cause Police Chief Tom Jackson is all of the following:

  1. Racist
  2. Without a single drop of Compassion
  3. Without a single drop of Empathy
  4. Without a single drop of common sense
  5. Ignorant of the community he is in charge of policing

No, I do not mean some of the above I mean all of the above. The make-up of the Ferguson Police Department is not reflective of the community they police, with a 53 person force only 3 are of Black that is .05%. This is however, reflective of the Chief of Police and the standard he sets. Consider this in relation to the overall Ferguson make-up.

Thus, my assessment of him as a human being and a public servant, he is a failure as both. Every single appearance he has made, including the most recent has shown him to be self-serving and without any understanding of the human condition, certainly not the condition of the community he is supposed to serve.

Consider the most recent atrocity.

His officers are attending their duties is a predominately African American community that saw one of their own lie in the street dead for four (4) hours after being gunned down by a cop by the name of Darren Wilson. Those cops, who are predominately White, are now wearing wristbands that read, “I AM DARREN WILSON”. It took the Department of Justice to stop this outrage.

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I could go on and on, forever about this blight on our nation. He is an outrage and an insult. He represents so much of what is wrong with law enforcement today. His picture should be in Merriam Webster next a number of different words starting with a word I am learning has many different meanings but fits; Dumbfuckery!

So Ferguson Police Chief Tom Jackson wins my second, I wish they wore protection.

Important links to information on DoJ involvement: Mr. Militant Negro

This is the most recent stunningly idiotic comments by Chief Tom Jackson and some of the response, it includes other thoughts on some of the other more recent police violence. Personally? I think he should shut the hell up.

Hypocrisy: “I Am Darren Wilson” Bracelets Worn By Ferguson Cops. The New Fashion Statement In Missouri.

I have no words, this is provocation at it most base level.

National Voter Registration Day Is September 23rd, 2014. Are YOU Registered?

This is so important, spread the word.


Poetry Header

Fingertips press gently against

Kiss swollen lips

My hand follows the trail

Where you touched

You left reminders on curves

Of your desire

The daylight shines through

Bidding an end

While you pull me back

Demanding anew

Valentine, 20-September-2014

Spice is Nice

Rottenecards_3711530_xd6br5b52tFundamentally I have nothing against consenting adults committing incest, you know first cousins marrying, even brothers and sisters having a go if that is what floats their boat. I would prefer they kept their rather twisted desires to themselves, but still fundamentally I am an open-minded adult and I have nothing against consenting adults doing what they want with each other.

If they are going to do this rather sick and nasty act, I just wish they wore protection.

You know, put a raincoat on, prevent conception. Do not under any circumstance visit the products of their choice to keep it in the family on the rest of us.

Let me give you some examples of what I am certain are the outcomes of that old saying, ‘Spice is nice but Incest is Best’.

First up on the hit parade: Secretary of State Kris Kobach, Kansas

In a three way race between Incumbent Pat Roberts and two challengers, Democrat Chad Taylor and Independent Greg Orman it was looking like Republican Pat Roberts would squeak by and hold his Senate seat for a third term. The voters who didn’t like good old Pat were splitting their vote between the two challengers, thus nobody had a clear lead. This was true until on September 3, Chad Taylor sent his very legal letter of withdrawal to State Secretary and honorary member of Pat Roberts re-election campaign, Kris Kobach; when that happened shit hit the fan.

Suddenly the numbers weren’t quite so good and Orman was ahead in the polling, things didn’t look good in the very Red state of Kansas anymore. Kris Kobach had to do something to fix the vote, fix the predicament Pat Roberts found KrisKobachhimself in, despite the influx of outside money from the Koch Brothers and the NRA, despite the historically RED of the voters of Kansas. What did Kobach do you ask? Well in his limited wisdom he decided he would refuse to remove the Democrats name from the Ballot, despite were he to somehow be elected he would refuse to serve. That’s right Kobach decided he would split the vote at the polls, fooling those who don’t have a television, listen to the radio or read the newspaper. He decided he would split the vote of those who vote a straight party line. He decided despite the quite legal withdrawal by Democrat Chad Taylor, he would leave his name on the ballot come November.

Well now we come to the crux of the matter, Kobach who doesn’t swim in the deep end of the gene pool decided who would not remove Mr. Taylor’s name from the ballot citing several nebulous laws and Mr. Taylor sued. Then Kobach told the Supreme Court of Kansas (Toto you out there?) he must have a decision by 18-September so the ballots could be printed and sent out to all those fine men and women in uniform, by law mind you. Well, the court ever mindful of their time constraints hand Kobach his ass along with their decision at close of business yesterday, Mr. Taylor will not be on the ballot come voting time, print those ballots and get them mailed without his name, thank you very much.

What do you think that product of incestuous relations said then? Go on guess, I dare you to take a guess.

No clue? Well first he said, ‘just kidding, I don’t need to print them tomorrow.’

Then, he demanded the Democratic Party of Kansas nominate a replacement for Mr. Taylor and place that person’s name on the ballot. He graciously gave them until 8-October to comply with his outrageous and completely ridiculous demands. I searched, while I am not a lawyer and certainly not a specialist in Kansas election standards, I couldn’t find a damned thing that would lead me to believe there must be a Democrat running for the Senate when there is a Republican losing the race against an Independent candidate. In fact, I am fairly certain from what I remember in my civics class there doesn’t even have to be two candidates if only one candidate shows up he / she wins.

From Kansas Election Standards: Candidate Withdrawals

A candidate who has filed for any office may withdraw before the candidate filing deadline by submitting a notarized written statement of withdrawal. [KSA 25-306a] After the filing deadline and after the primary, a candidate for national, state, county or township office who does not wish to be a candidate must submit a notarized written statement declaring him/herself to be “incapable of fulfilling the duties of office” if elected. [KSA 25-306b(b)] Candidate withdrawals create vacancies in candidacies, which in the case of party candidacies are filled by party district convention. [KSA 25-3904, 25-3904a].

There is no provision in law for replacing independent candidates if they withdraw. Likewise, there is no provision in law for replacing candidates in nonpartisan races. So Secretary of State Kris Kobach wins my first I wish they wore protection.



This will be a regular feature going forward; there will be others because really there are so many others who fit the bill. I truly do wish they wore protection.

The Gates To Hopeland Are Wide Open: The Devon And Leah Sari Still Story.

We focus so often on all that is wrong in the world, lately all that is wrong in the NFL. This shows the compassion and humanity that exists as well.

Till Now


Your name whispers across my dreams

Do you hear me across the distance

Are your dreams filled with me

As mine are with you

When I reach for you in the night

Do you feel my caress across your skin

From our final soft good-night

My eyes close and sleep overtakes me

I feel you wrap around me, pulling me in

My chest beats a tattoo, a rhythm of night

Sending primal messages, I chase eagerly

Through drenched sceneries we raised

With laughter and talk of other things

We build realms for us to explore

Shadows and silk trap me within reveries

Imagined by us for pleasure alone

I soar, unbound by any chain of propriety

Landing only when I hear your call to return

The weight of desire holds me to earth

Unremembered till you, unknown till now

Are you real, my heart tells me yes

Valentine, 13 September 2014

The MilitantNegro™ SoapBox: Dumbfuckery; The NFL & Roger Goodell Are Under Investigation.

What I didn’t say yet needs to be said.

The News Cycle Bites

soapboxpile“A bad year and a bad month to all the backbiting bitches in the world!…” 
― Miguel de Cervantes SaavedraDon Quixote


The first man to call me wife also called me whore and property. I have written about my nearly three years under his roof and his fists, here and elsewhere. I have exposed small parts of my life as a runaway at 15, a claimed woman child with no safe haven until he stretched out his hand and lifted me up. No, he wasn’t a ‘true’ husband, but by Texas law, he could claim the title and I did not know better. I was young, uneducated and afraid. I was afraid of him, I was more afraid of the streets.

I will not catalog every abuse, suffice to say in my nearly three years with him he broke several bones, he beat me so badly I lost my uterus and one ovary, he broke my nose more than once. Other parts of my body, suffered long-term damage and I carry many scars where I had to be stitched up after one of his beatings. This doesn’t even come close to cataloguing the emotional damaging those three years did to me. I never fought back after the first time.

People often ask why we stay, why an abused partner stays. There are many reasons, sometimes fear is the overriding reason. He told me if I tried to leave he would find me and kill me, I believed him. I was also afraid of the streets I had already been on, something I had already lived through and understood. I had nowhere to go, no one to turn to for help. In the early 1970’s there was no domestic violence laws, no shelters to protect us. In fact, domestic violence was ignored entirely unless someone died.


Domestic violence took over the news cycles the past couple of days; we have been subject to the left hook of Ray Rice in the elevator. Everyone has an opinion and for the most part that opinion is there is no pit in hell deep enough or hot enough for Ray Rice. Furthermore, the NFL and the DA didn’t do enough to punish him for that left hook and what followed. Dragging his fiancé out of the elevator, leaving her lying on the ground, legs and arms akimbo and name-calling, AP presumably has a video with audio in which the casino offers to cover up for him.

Here is the problem in this entire scenario, Janay Palmer Rice slapped Ray Rice first, she spit on him first in the elevator  and appears to have been the aggressor before the infamous left hook. None of us knows what came before the three minutes we have been made privy too, we don’t know what else their lives look like. We don’t know who they are, separately or together. We only know the Left Hook and being the good little drones we all are, we have drawn our conclusions and we have publicly pilloried Ray Rice, without ever once questioning her actions that came before.

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Could he have handled it better? Restrained her instead of punching her, maybe he could have. Likely, this would have been a better choice. However, this says people don’t have a right to defend themselves from an assault if they are men and it is a woman assaulting them. It says as a woman, short of wielding a knife and threatening a man’s life, I can do just about any damned thing I like and get away with it, that no man has a right to hit me, not even in self-defense.

I call bullshit. Yes, me a survivor of horrific domestic violence where I never once defended myself, where I never once raised my hand or my voice, I call bullshit.

There are far worse in the NFL then Ray Rice, if the NFL wants to make examples start with those who have killed, used drugs, been arrested for DWI, or hand all the abusers the same outcome as Ray Rice, it is simple to find this information, go here.

In the meantime, I have another issue with this entire news cycle. It is the diversion, the look over there style of reporting. The amazingly simplemindedness of it all has me dumbfounded. While the entire nation focuses on the left hook of Ray Rice, we forget the national tragedy of a militarized police force in every town, big or small across the land. We forget the unarmed men and women, mostly of color, mostly Black bleeding out on our streets.

We forget Eric Garner, John Crawford, Michael Brown, Ezell Ford, Kajieme Powell, Marlene Pinnock and these are just the names of those beaten or murdered by cops between July and August of this year.

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At no time did these names, did these murders, did this tragedy elicit the call to action by so many from every side of the aisle, as the left hook of Ray Rice. The murderous acts of cops do not so much as cause our elected representatives to blink. Riot gear, tear gas and wooden bullets turned on peaceful demonstrators doesn’t elicit even 5 minutes of; ‘calm your asses down out there’ from the administration. But the Left Hook of Ray Rice has Congress demanding action from the NFL and the President of the United States issue statements.

I will say it one last time; I am a survivor of domestic violence. At no time did I defend myself; I knew if I did, it would be worse. I was fifteen when it started. I was eighteen when I ran. There are many reasons why a person stays, sometimes it is fear, other times it is love; sometimes it is because we are so broken we think we deserve the abuse. No one can judge. We do not have the right to judge Ray or Janay, not now and not then. What we do have the right to do is step off and start looking at this situation with more clarity.

Men should not hit women; in most cases, they are larger and stronger. However, women shouldn’t hit men, shouldn’t attack, shouldn’t place themselves in the position where a man must defend himself and thus will likely hurt her in the process. I am sorry but self-defense is not abuse. It is a fine line, I understand this however, women are as responsible for staying on the other side of that line as men are. Some of the things I have heard over the past couple of days are idiotic, things that would seem to mean that we expect men to be saints, at all time. Things that would seem to mean a man has no right ever to defend himself under any circumstance, this is simply wrong and wrong-headed.

Some things that are important to know with regard to Domestic Violence, men make up approximately 40% of domestic violence victims.

Over a year ago we fought to refund VAWA, the battle was hard fought and there were some significant concessions that had to be made. Some of the issues the GOP hated? The expansions of services to poorly served populations including Native women on reservations and the LGBT community.

In the meantime, cops are beating and murdering in the streets and the outcry isn’t near what it is for the Left Hook of Ray Rice.

What is wrong with the morality and values of this nation? Don’t you think it is time to start asking this question?

Another take on it: http://theobamacrat.com/2014/09/09/raymell-mourice-ray-rice-abuser-victim-or-both/

I leave you with this.

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