Hope and Apathy

soapboxpilePlease read here for the best synopsis of Fridays mass killing, my friend Jueseppi has done a spectacular job of putting it all together: http://theobamacrat.com/2014/05/25/university-of-california-santa-barbara-isla-vista-shooting-rampage-7-reported-dead-including-22-year-old-shooter-elliot-rodger/


I had planned to stay silent over the killings in Isla Vista on Friday, what is one more voice after all. The truth is I planned to stay silent because it is impossible for me to write through my heartache at more young lives lost. As I write this, my heart is cracking, tears periodically leak from my eyes and stream down my cheeks. I cannot help but think of the families of those who lost their lives. I cannot help but think of those who will have the long road ahead of them toward recovery, the fears they will face, the triggers they will have to overcome, the nightmares that will awaken them in the future all because we failed them, because one man with a gun decided to take retribution for his failure with women.

I think this father’s grief says it best:

Twenty-two years ago, I got lucky. I lived when I wasn’t supposed to. Friday night six young people lost their lives. Yes, I am aware the killer also lost his life, frankly I do not care that he is dead. I am sorry for his parents, they lost their child but he took the lives of six others before he died, he attempted to take the lives of seven others. Had he been successful his minimum body count would have been thirteen, had he achieved his true aim it would have been much higher.

Already in much of the mainstream media, this mass murderer is being referred to as a ‘child’ with psychological problems, trying to excuse his behavior, trying to give him an out for his spree. Not only will I not name him, let the Devil do that while he burns in hell, I will not excuse him or anyone else I blame for the lost lives on Friday.

So let’s clear some of the excuses off the table, first this is not a ‘child’ this was a twenty-two year old man, a fully grown man, in college, living in an apartment, with a car (a BMW no less) and an income, albeit likely one he didn’t earn. The next thing we should be clear about is the childhood diagnosis of High-Functioning Asperger Syndrome, while he might not have been as socially adept as his peers due to Asperger Syndrome; his family had the means to provide him the very best treatment and education throughout his life. It is unlikely he was that far behind unless the diagnosis of High-Functioning was incorrect, based on his videos and his ‘manifesto’ he was simply selfish, spoiled and self-centered. I accept the diagnosis of Asperger, it appears he wasn’t a ‘normal’ twenty-two year-old, this does not however, make him mentally deficient, insane or otherwise incapable of knowing right from wrong.

Let’s be really clear, he was a twenty-two year-old man who believed the world and women in particular owed him something, in this case owed him ‘sex’, the fact that he remained a virgin at his age bothered him immensely. That he believed he was a ‘god’ compared to others who he saw with the women he wanted, as seen from a quote from one of his videos:

“I see so many beautiful, blonde haired girls. So many beautiful blonde-haired girls walking around everywhere. In your revealing shorts. Your cascading blonde hair. Your pretty faces. And I want one for a girlfriend… I’m 22 years old and I’ve never had a girlfriend. I’m still a virgin. I’ve never had the pleasure of having sex with a girl. Sleeping with a girl. Kissing a girl. I’ve never even held a girl’s hand,”

Or another quote:

“Girls gave their affection and sex and love to other men but never to me”

Now, six young people are dead and seven others will have to live with his actions, because this man, believed he was owed and took it in his head to follow through with his threat:

“If I had it in my power. I would stop at nothing to reduce every single one of you to mountains of skulls and rivers of blood,” adding “You deserve to be annihilated, and I will give that to you,” he said, speaking of what he termed his “day of retribution.”

When it all goes wrong, this is what happens. This is the aftermath, this is what happens to communities.

How many must die before we get right with our children? How many times does this have to happen before we stop the insanity of out of control gun laws that allow massacres on the streets of our nation to happen indiscriminately? When are we going to demand change and why aren’t we asking the relevant questions such as, where did he get a gun?

That last question isn’t as obvious as it might sound, as someone with a ‘disorder’, not insane but not entirely normal either, he would be on a list that would bar him from gun ownership in a sane world. We don’t live in a sane world though, do we?

Three Stooges

Three Stooges

We live in a world where Ted Nugent, Sarah Palin and Wayne LaPierre have more power to determine whether our children will be safe on the streets and in their schoolrooms than the majority of Americans.

Please note, none of them are elected officials, I can tell you what all of them have in common though:

RACISM, NRA, SYG and a complete lack of intellectual discernment.

Worse yet? Most recent polls show their messaging is getting through to the ignorant and uninformed, their constant flow of misinformation is having an impact and more citizens of this nation are leaping on the bandwagon. More Americans believe gun control laws should be ‘less’ strict rather than more strict, this coming from the most recent Gallup Poll. As gun deaths rise, as mass murder rises, as our children lay bleeding in the streets, the school yards and even in their own homes; Americans look and shrug their shoulders and say to themselves fuck it, open the floodgates.

How many more must die? How many more mothers and fathers must bury their children in the cold earth?

Twenty-two years ago, my father got lucky. Mr. Martinez and the other parents of Friday’s mass killing were not as lucky. I am heartbroken for them, shattered for them. My friend said the following to me, knowing I sign my e-mail ‘helplessly hopeful”:

Well, in “Hopeland”, things are OK. Here in reality where I live, this shit ain’t ovah. There will be many more shooting rampages to come. Get yo popcorn and get ready for the show.”

It was somewhat cruel, I know the monsters are out there, he isn’t wrong though is he; until we, as citizens get up off our apathetic asses and demand change we are lost and the victims will continue to pile up. Hope, it isn’t enough and it will not stem the tears of all the parents who lose their children. We must take our nation back from those who would destroy it. We must stand up and say no more.

What soothes my heart at times like this:










  1. Val, My heart goes out.. .. What is happening within the minds of some very mixed up individuals today? Its heart breaking..

    • Sue, the problem is I look at the minds who fight to allow it to continue, not the minds of those who pull the trigger. They are problems, yes. But the bigger problem are those who stand up and say let the blood run in the streets, your children are less than my right to pull the trigger. These are the true monsters, these are the true killers.

  2. You tell it like it is!

  3. It seems there is always an excuse, doesn’t it. Always a reason other than easy access to weapons with only one purpose — to kill. Only one purpose.

    I am sick to death of the excuses. Of people thinking that the world owes them something. This guy thinks he deserved a girlfriend? Then treat people right (which does not, I repeat, NOT, include giving off the vibes likely given off by a guy who might one day commit mass murder. And to folks who are disappointed in life? The Rolling Stones said it best: “You Can’t Always Get What You Want”


    • Elyse, you know I love you right? If not let me repeat myself, I love you. Yes FUCK YOU to the NRA and all those who support the, fall in with them and turn a blind eye to what they are doing. I have been on edge all weekend, for some reason this one got to me. Actually they all get to me, but for some reason this one got under my skin more. Maybe it was the father of the victim, every single time I see him I break down.

      I am so tired of this, how many more?

      • I’ve been out of the loop all weekend, so I have read little about this latest slice of insanity. You, Val, have more reason to weep, I think. Between your own horrible tragedy and your outreach work you have done much to face the reality of it all. The rest of us (me included) can go about our lives untouched. Until we are touched.

        Ia close friend’s nephew went to a Columbine; knew students and faculty at VA Tech; I know Sandy Hook. We all know messed up teens and Twenty-.

        • I am for some reason falling apart though right now and so these things are crawling inside of me and causing me to itch. I don’t think we can measure, honestly Elyse I don’t. Every single time this happens, we are all of us victims. That is the problem.

      • My iPad jammed in the middle of my comment. Grrrrr.
        Not only do we know folks like that, We WERE like that. Nobody goes through adolescence and young adulthood without feeling like everybody else gets what we want. Get fucking over it. Grow a pair. Grow up.

        Sorry — this us my delayed reaction to the latest tragedy that would not have happened without out fellow country men’s obsession with guns. I wish we could just send them all up to Sarah Palin’s Alaska …

        • Not me Elyse, there are people in Alaska. There in fact some very nice people up there include indigenous people who are still trying to preserve their way of life.

          Lets ask Denmark if we can have Greenland instead.

  4. So much senseless waste of young people. So much. When will it stop? Seems politicians enjoy the frat club and have forgotten what it’s like in the trenches.

  5. Yes, I saw this on the news. So sad and it’s becoming so common – the norm, even. My heart goes out to the families.

    We don’t allow gun ownership in Singapore – even owning parts of a gun – used cartridges – or toy lookalikes will get one into trouble with the law.


    • Jueseppi B. says:

      Common sense says if Singapore can enact this type of tight gun control, so can America. Good Monday to you Mr. Eric.

      • It’s interesting because we have universal draft and every male Singapore citizen above age 18 served/serves 2 years in the military or police. Officers remain in operationally active reserves till age 45 and NCOs till age 40 – every year we spend 2 to 3 weeks in uniform for refreshers.

        Believe me, we know how to handle weapons – but we also know that weapons have a place in society – either with the military/police or locked away in the armouries. Period!

    • It is the one thing I loved about Singapore Eric. Walking everywhere at anytime, day or night I never felt unsafe. The worst thing I every had to do was chase the cab drivers off who didn’t understand I was walking for the joy of it in the middle of the day.

      I had a hard time all week-end. You know my heart though, it cracks every time something like this happens.


  6. Val, You know how he fooled 7 police officers who came to do a welfare check on him back in April? What I want to know, before the officers decided he was coherent and could be left alone, did they take into account his writings and YouTube videos too? I mean, apparently his mom and therapist had been concerned because of his online rantings and that’s why the welfare check was requested. But did the police first view that stuff or just base their decision that he’s okay only on the conversation they had with him? I can’t help but feel the outcome might’ve been different if they looked at his video. If only they had looked in his room.

    • I agree with you Monica, if only. That is the question I asked as well. Why wasn’t he under involuntary lock down given the content of his ravings. His own mother thought he was dangerous. This is where we are as a society, a dangerous individual is left to murder six people. While we don’t know where he got the gun, I am going to bet it was legally purchased.

      • He purchased guns from three different locations. There should be a way to connect all these dealers, so that they know someone’s going to different shops to load up. That alone should’ve been a red flag. Why does anyone need so much gunware anyway? I’m so sick of the Second Amendment. I honestly don’t think this is what the forefathers had in mind. That amendment was written in a different time and I don’t suppose they could’ve imagined a a future when dumb guns would no longer be needed. So frustrating.

        • It is not what the 2nd was intended for. Anyone who has ever read the writings of the Framers, knows what the 2nd was written for and what its original intent was. Anyone who has ever read the Federalist Papers knows what was intended. That it has been corrupted, twisted and pissed upon by these ignorant cretins to make our nation one of murder, mayhem and blood is simply their way of fighting back their loss of power. If you trace the original intent of the NRA you would see a much different organization.

    • Jueseppi B. says:

      I could be wrong but the video and manifesto were done recently, and he made both available to the public hours before his attack. Thats what I understood. One has to understand law enforcement treads lightly in cases of caucasian citizens rights, especially if wealthy caucasians.

      Pardon my butting in.

      • You are welcome anywhere. I think though there were others, others that made his mother worry he was going off the deep end. Something caused her to call the police. Agree with you though, the question remains, did they even look at whatever his mother saw?

      • I thought he had posted other videos and that this last one wasn’t the first. If that’s not the case, then I guess, the police didn’t have much to go on. It’s maddening, though, to read that he himself was nervous the police were going to figure things out. Too bad that they couldn’t see through his “act.” Poor little rich boy.

    • I think that’s why he was considered “High-Functioning” – I think it means that he is able to function in a society and effectively mask his condition, or not let it affect his behavior if he made a conscious effort. So it might not be so surprising that he was able to convince the police that he’s just sane enough. That, or his dad is rich.

      • That is exactly what it means according to what I read. It means with intervention, which I assume he received throughout his childhood, he would easily move through the world. It doesn’t mean he would still have some of the problems his condition was known for, included being less socially adept than his peers, however according to everything I read, he wouldn’t react this way. His Asperger cannot be blamed for what he has done, it would be a mistake to do so. Everything I read before writing this points to these being very separate issues.

  7. What can I say, this isn’t a sane world! It really boggles the mind that after so many incidents there is still opposition to gun control laws! My heart goes out to the victims families.

  8. Jueseppi B. says:

    Reblogged this on The ObamaCrat™.

  9. lwk2431 says:

    “How many times does this have to happen before we stop the insanity of out of control gun laws that allow massacres on the streets of our nation to happen indiscriminately?”

    He killed half of his victims with a knife, not a gun.

    In Californica, near a university, guess there weren’t any citizens with a concealed carry license to shoot back and maybe stop him.


    • You make this distinction to say what exactly? That he knew how to kill with both knifes and guns? Well how marvelous, a versatile killer. Should I read your comment to mean you approve of his actions? This is the only way I can read it, so yet another murdering asshole on the lose, I will keep it in mind. Someone else with a gun and an attitude, a chip on his shoulder. What pray tell would that chip be? Just curious by the way, based on the comment I sent to spam I am guessing it might be the same thing, not enough pussy.

    • Jueseppi B. says:

      lwk2431, you must be the dumbest moron gun sucking muthafucka breathing oxygen.

      First the 3 roommates were not killed with a knife. The law enforcement personal stated at the press conference yesterday that a knife was specifically NOT the weapon used to kill those 3 victims. Autopsy needs to be performed to determine cause of death and weapon used. Dumbass.

      Second, if you were to attempt to get facts before typing, you might be taken more seriously, instead of looked at as a tiny penis having stupid racist gunupyourass perverted human being….that you are.

      I suspect 97.8756% of your thoughts revolve around weapons you have never been properly instructed on how to use. If every mass killing involved knives instead of guns/firearms, that would amount to about 300 deaths a year, not the 30,000 currently experienced by families, friends and loved ones in America.

      Being trained by uncle Sam in all things weaponry, I could disarm your weak ass in 3.4 seconds and shove your guns up your anus, as could most men/women with my training. Ponder that.

      Lastly, cover your eyes ladies…..lwk, go suck a penis. ʚ(ˆ◡ˆ)ɞ
      Have a nice Memorial Day weekend.

      • Thank you, you said it far better than I ever could.

        • Jueseppi B. says:

          After 30,000 annual gun deaths in the United States Of AmeriKKKa, it shouldn’t have to be said at all. I truly hope he/she/it responds with another comment out of he/she/it’s rectum. ʚ(ˆ◡ˆ)ɞ

      • lwk2431 says:

        Jueseppi B. wrote:

        “Have a nice Memorial Day weekend”

        I will. It is my special day to remember all the names of my friends who are on the Vietnam War Memorial in Washington and contemplate how many Communists are no longer on the sunny side of the dirt because of us.


        • Jueseppi B. says:

          “US” my muthafuckin Black ass. U R too dumb to have ever served in any branch of the United States Of America military. If I were close enough to you, I’d snap your racist gunloving neck. U R, as of this second in time, ignored. I am absofuckinlutely allergic to your type of dumbfuckery.

        • You must have believed you were to be given free rein to spout off anything you wished within the walls of my blog, you were not. In fact it was unfortunate I was not here to monitor you ongoing posting, they would not have gotten through. Jueseppi, on the other hand has free rein to say anything he desires to the likes of you, at anytime he wishes. He is never monitored nor do I ask him to be civil, he is a grown assed man who does not require me to provide oversight to his thoughts, actions or tongue.

          You might have noted, your second comment of the moment never got through. You were seen for what you were with that. I have deleted many of your other comments already, sending them to spam. You are indeed exactly what Jueseppi has identified you as, one need only examine your own blog to identify you.

          You are a small man. With a small mind.

          • Jueseppi B. says:

            Don’t forget a tiny penis, which explains his obsession with firearms. They shoot off because he is incapable of doing so himself. OK I am done with this one. Next….

            • I didn’t forget, I am simply a lady (most of the time). I could have also said, “Bless your heart”. Which has a very different meaning, but I chose not to.

              Thank you My. He is sent to Spam now and will not be allowed to return to pollute my pages.

  10. Jueseppi B. says:

    Beautifully written and very true on all counts and levels. I will reblog when I wake up and can see clearly. Namaste.
    ☜(◉‿◉)☞ (Me standing & clapping)

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